When you dream about sailing, do you dream about bottom paint running down your arms?

I opted out of painting the dinghy’s bottom. There are these little places on the keel that the paint always falls off. I should have touched it up, but, how do I know it doesn’t fall off the minute I put it in the water?

I did clean the bottom and the hull. With that stuff that smells like rotten eggs which will eat through a few layers of skin if you get it on you. Ah, the romance of the sea, pure air, salt breeze, and Muriatic Acid.

“Why are you launching the dinghy?” Guy wants to know.

“Because then I can row it around and stuff,” I say. What he really wants to know is, does the launching of the dinghy portend a launch of Flying Circus.

Here is where I am supposed to practice compassionate acceptance. After all, Guy is accepting of me. He is complaining a lot, but, the truth is, he isn’t actively stopping me.

“Did you paint the bottom of the dinghy?”
“Do I have to? It looks all right.”
“I guess not, I think it was two-season paint.”
“Well, I don’t want to do the wrong thing.”
“Then leave the boat in the yard.”
“You said I could launch it.”
“I changed my mind.”
“Too late, because I have already gotten things going and have been investigating all the options.”
“Well you had better investigate them.”

But he doesn’t stop me. I mean, what would he do, call the police or something and say help, my partner is trying to launch our boat?

I read a meditation the other day. We do not fight. We have nothing to defend. So, I am attempting to move through what I need to do without a fight. We’ve been having a good time, lovely dinners, talk. So there isn’t any tension.

Sometimes, when we are ready to stretch our own wings, we have to remember that the people who love us might feel insecure about our independence. Will we still need them? Also, there are times when people might feel as though being an expert at something or being in charge of something defines their self-worth. If their partner comes along and wants to also participate in that activity in such a way as to be capable rather than dependent, this can also upset the balance for a little while, too.

So we have to love each other through these growing pains.

It turns out that I can get the dinghy in the trailer myself. I used to loathe having to lift that thing with Guy. I thought I was going to have a heart attack every time. Well, I backed the trailer up to it and hefted it in. Then had to flip it over.

Zach came out of the barn just then. Guy’s coworker.

“See, you didn’t need any men to do that, you got it in by yourself.”

I’ve been up since 4.30, when I began my day with a misty jog, so now bed.